The Perfect Rosé

Hi all young goblins (and other readers),

This week was crazy, it felt like it flew by because it was very out of the ordinary.

Monday we woke up early, went shopping, and drove down to Bossier City. We went and got our tire fixed, due to a stray nail that had decided to make its home in our tire, and then drove into Shreveport for Zone pday! It was fun to see the whole Zone, and we had hot dogs and did goldfish racing! It was more fun then anyone expected, especially when Elder Davis ate one :)

In the evening we did exchanges with the Brownlee Elders, and we went to an FHE that their Spanish group was having. It had amazing steak tacos, and other food at it. The only problem was the Guacamole, which was so incredibly spicy that even all the Mexicans were sweating profusely! Later that evening we saw a gator in the Brownlee Elders pond, and Elder David fed it bread which it seemed to like very much :))

Tuesday was the 4th, and we started it off by going to district council. Then us and the Brownlee Elders drove an hour and a half up to Taylor, AR to eat a 4th of July lunch with some members! They came with us so they could do exchanges in our area for once. We drove into the RV park near the lake in Taylor, and then had a great time with the Masses. Lunch was good we had some big sausages, and pasta salad and chips. When we were leaving it started POURING, so we drifted the back of the truck at every opportunity, and tried to hit as many puddles as possible while driving on the dirt roads back! I love driving in the forest in the rain. 

We drove down to Springhill, and split up. I went with Elder Freeman, and we walked around one of the northern neighborhoods. It was still raining so we didn't expect anyone to be out, plus it was the 4th so it kinda felt like a waste of time. But we were wrong, there WAS a few people out, and we were able to get a couple numbers, teach a guy about our church and correct his misconceptions, and help some very incompetent people set up a badminton net! (They were putting the poles upside down, and then trying to tie the net just straight to the pole and ignoring the loops that were meant to hook onto some hooks which they neglected to attach. This was all because they didn't even SCAN the instruction booklet tsk tsk)

In the evening we all met up back in Magnolia, and ate at What-A-Burger. It was good but way too expensive for what you get. But the Banana Pudding shake was one of the best Shakes I've had, so that redeemed it slightly! After dinner we split again and Elder Freeman and I went and taught Diabolical David and Charlien. We taught them about the importance of Priesthood Authority and baptism, and talked about what they've been learning. D. David has not been reading at all, but Charlien watches Book of Mormon videos every day! D. David seemed to musing on something throughout the lesson, probably thinking about his next evil scheme. They also told us that they like to order pizza, eat a slice or two, and then order another one just because. Whatever that accomplishes...

We also walked around, and met a guy named Jimmy. Got his number and invited him to get the Book of Mormon app. After our evening we all met back up at the apartment, and then put the mattress in the back of our truck and watched the fireworks haha

Wednesday all 4 of us went to the Thrift store to help out, and I found a super cute panda that I had no choice to acquire. It was extremely expensive, but worth it ($0.50). Then we ate Chick-fil-A at the SAU food court, and the other Elders left. We went and taught a guy named Enoch from France after that, and he loved the Restoration! He wants to play professional soccer which is cool too. We also taught Tyre the Plan of Salvation. 

In the evening we drove down to Haynesville, and went out with Brother Bahr down there! We had a lesson with a less-active member that was baptized a few years ago named Debbie Ryan! We were very bold with her and talked about how important church is since she hasnt been in over 6 months. At the end we invited her to church, and Brother Bahr offered her a ride! To our surprise she said she would come!

Then we went to visit a media referral named Monica (I have made up a potential name for her, because I am too lazy to press the home button and open the other app to see what her actual name is). She wasn't there, but as we were getting into our car to our surprise Brother Bahr went over and talked to a guy working on his lawnmower. Let me paint a scene:

Behind us: trees, abandoned house, dead-end road, feral horse, and pile of old machine parts (next to house)

To our left: big scary forest (bsf for short), and old truck sitting in the forest for no apparent reason

Straight ahead: the road, and some run-down little houses, the corner house is a small little house from which anything could emerge (slhfwace for short)

To our right: ancient guy who's face has had so many things hit it that you can see scars everywhere (hit by bars and things in the oilfield), his lawnmower which consists of about 6 total pieces of the thousands of parts a lawnmower SHOULD have, small trailor home which is falling apart and has smashed windows, lawn covered in random parts and trash organized in a specific way as to make it impossible to find ANYTHING, also the sun

Now that you can imagine the picture in your mind I can accurately share the account. 

So this old guy named Rusty David started talking with us, but the only problem was he had such a thick Cajun accent that we could only understand 1 word in each sentence pretty much. It was basically gibberish haha--and he had no teeth. As he was talking we looked over to the bsf, and saw a figure emerging. As he came into the light we saw he was this vacant-eyed guy, who walked and looked straight ahead as he walked, as if in a trance. As he walked past Rusty David told us (at least I think so) that this was Bill, a random guy who sometimes comes and stays at his house. We continued trying to talk to R. David, and started teaching the restoration but everything we asked a question he started telling us about his mower and how much he hates the state of the world. Finally we gave up trying to teach him, and then a guy holding a pipe came out of the slhfwace. And trailing him was a kid. They came up to us and Rusty David, and the little kid sat on the mower. The older fellow started arguing with David about the pipe he was holding for some reason, and then stopped to introduce ourselves to the kid. The kid ignored us and didn't even GLANCE at us. Then David and the older guy started yelling again so we just left :))

This is what Louisiana is like.

We also visited some others who promptly rejected us, but we did meet a lady named Dorothy and were able to teach her about the Book of Mormon! We ended the evening back in Magnolia with some virtual work, and one of our Burger King employee friends let us try the Impossible Whopper. It was surprisingly good! 

Thursday morning we drove down to Bossier City, and then carpooled with them down to Longview for a Meet-and-Greet with the new mission president. We tried a pizza buffet place called CiCi's on the way which was not bad. At the Longview building we got to meet with the Taylor's,  and it's going to be interesting cause they have a kid at home! He seems cool, and so does their daughter Jocelyn who goes to BYU some missionaries seem to think...

President Taylor is nice, I'm waiting for the hidden iron hand though cause I've only seen his nice side. Hes definitely a businessman though I could instantly tell. He struck the perfect balance of asserting dominance, and being likable that I could tell he'd practiced it many times with other groups he's lead. I didn't like how he went on and on about all his accomplishments, but I don't think he was trying to be prideful, he just felt a need to show us he is up to the task. Overall I think he will be cool though, we will see how things go. 

Thursday evening Brother Harris took us out to eat in Bossier City and I got the Cajundillas! They were super good, even though the name is bad. 

On Friday we drove back and then went up to Waldo! We taught Xavier, and met his Sister, Dee, whos in town from Atlanta. She said she works in the "Entertainment Industry" whatever that means. We talked about the Book of Mormon, but then Xavier got off track and started suggesting good bars we could check out in Shreveport, and offering us the services of his friend who could get us some liquor, and some girls. Tsk tsk he has a long way to go, but he said hed be at church! And hopefully I don't take him up on his offer or I may finish this drunk :)

Saturday we walked the dogs as usual. This time we got a few we haven't walked before, and mine enjoyed throwing itself at the ground, and then lying there on its back to rest. Then I would drag it to a standing position, it would walk for a bit, and then repeat. Elder Davis' dog couldn't stand the heat and I've never heard a dog pant so fast. Sounded like he was constantly hyperventilating haha

On Sunday church went super well! President Platt came to our Presidency meeting, and spoke in church. It went really well, he's a cool guy. Also Doneshia, D. David, Charlien, Tyre, and Xavier came to church! They all really liked it! Also had branch Council which went super well, and we talked to a cool lady named Joel.

-Abe

🦓⚔️🥭

Adieu! Bonjour, la oso 

I thought I'd try my hand at a little language to start this email off! Not sure what language or if it's where it belongs, but these questions weren't meant to be answered. This week was pretty good, many things happened and I will try to recount but a hundredth part.

Monday we perused a local pawnshop, and some other stores, but spent most of the day relaxing and talking. In the evening we biked around (which was a mistake I suppose since we had so many miles that we couldn't even fathom using them all) but we taught some cool lessons! We taught Doneshia, Charlien (I have learned the correct spelling now), and The David, and to our astonishment when we arrived Tyre emerged from their house too! It was very weird to see some of our teaching pool mix into a larger conglomerate. We also taught Neena, and then Miss Marshall! We were able to give her a Book of Mormon, and she was super excited to read it! 

On Tuesday we ended up using many of our miles, doing as many visits to far-off inactive members as my heart desired! We also did service at the Thrift store and sorted many more cords. In the afternoon we drove to Stamps and Lewisville, and were able to talk to some people that don't see missionaries very often. One of the ladies we talked to is named Dolly, and she collects crosses so we got to see more than our fill of them. We also got Shakes at a small burger joint in Lewisville. They were good cause it was 109⁰ but I think that's the main reason. In the evening we drove to Waldo and not a soul wanted to talk to us. We did give some cookies to the workers at Burger king though! (Elder Davis made them ((from store-bought dough)) during dinner). 

On Wednesday we drove down for district council in the morning, and the ZLs came up for it too! So that was a good time, and I gave a training on the Book of Mormon. After district council we drove up to Springhill and ate at Sam's Southern Eatery, and went out with Sammy and visited people in the area. Talked to Tawanna again, and we are hoping to help her get her Patriarchal blessing!

In the evening we taught Charlien and Doneshia, and Doneshia told us all about how she opened up to Omni (of all places) and it was just what she needed! She also said it's the church for her. We had Sister Bahr join us virtually for the lesson and she shared a great testimony and read some really good verses in 3 Nephi that help her! They really connected well. We also taught Miss Marshall again, cause she actually called us when we left a card on her door! Which never happens.

Thursday morning we got a call from a very frantic The David asking if we could come give a blessing to his Grandmother who was at the hospital ASAP. So we ran over there, and gave her a blessing, which went well. We also learned The David diet:

1. breakfast: coffee and cigarettes 

2. lunch: None

3. dinner: a litre of Mountain Dew and pizza

4. midnight snack: 10 PB & J sandwiches

We walked the dogs, and did some weekly planning, and then for dinner we ate with the Marchans. It went pretty well, they had pretty good enchiladas, and super good guac as usual. In the evening we drove out to the middle of nowhere to visit some media referrals, and one of them was a lady named Linda. The mosquitos were so numerous that they were like a fog, so we only talked for a second, but she pointed to my Book of Mormon and said, "is that mine?" And I had no choice but to fork it over. Then she tried to hug us but didn't seem in her right mind so we left haha

Also I love driving through the forests on these country roads at night! Super fun

On Friday we went to Lewisville again, and everyone we had appointments with flaked out...tsk tsk why can't anyone be relied on even the littlest bit! In the evening we taught Doneshia, while Charlien and David were apparently staying at some hotel haha--but Doneshia is the important one! We put her on date for the 15th! Which is super exciting. We warned her that Satan would combine against her and to stay strong. She told us that it couldn't get any worse than it was now which was a mistake...stay tuned...

Also taught Kathy who was awkward and didn't really seem that interested. Dont know why she is even on our teaching list haha

On Saturday we walked the dogs, this time some new ones who could only go in circles. So they walked in circles as we navigated these circle forward. Also we met a girl named Kindey who seems really interested in talking with us!

In the evening some members from the Plano 4th ward who are related to some members in our ward took us out to dinner at Flying Burger! It was quite good, very good Ranch, and the burger was excellent too. Not the best, but definitely in the competition. It was super nice to hang out with some members who were normal nice people! I like all the interesting people too, but sometimes it's good to have a break haha

In the evening we got a frantic call from The David saying that there was a shooting on their street, and the police had come and talked to everyone and that he and Charlien had gotten out of there to lay low in a hotel until things calmed down. We asked about Doneshia and they said they weren't sure where she had gone. He told us to stay away from that street for now, but to come talk to them at their hotel. This sounded fishy to us, so we ignored David's advice completely and drove straight to his straight. It looked was so dangerous and the shooting must have been super bad because their were some little kids playing a nice game of pig, some birds cheering, some old ladies on their lawns enjoying the sunset, and some jolly lights coming from in some of the run-down houses. We were shivering we were so scared of this mild and quiet street!!!! Just joking, there had obviously been no shooting. We found Doneshia sitting at her neighbor's house, and she told us that Diabolical David had been telling us tall tales. Apparently what really happened is he didn't pay the rent on their house, and then called the police and got Doneshia evicted. So they turned off the electricity, and then Diabolical David apparently got in trouble for how he was treating some of the people there (neglect) and so now he was on the run! 

Sunday Tyre came to church again, and in the evening we taught Diabolical David and Charlien. They seem to really believe their story so not sure if we've figured out all the pieces yet. But we also taught Tyre and put him on date for the 29th which is exciting!

-Abe

Gargantuan Bunny

Hi people, 

We had a fun but hot week here! Sometimes getting as high as 98⁰ and 110⁰ if you factor in humidity haha

On Monday in the morning we drove down to Bossier City for pday and then exchanges, and hung out with the Brownlee Elders all day! It was a blast we even got to go to my favorite store ever--Bass Pro Shops!!! Just joking, it's an okay store, nothing special haha--not sure what all the rave is about. But we did see an alligator which was fun! We had Popeyes for lunch, and my chicken sandwich was pretty good, much better than I was expecting. After our pday in the evening I went on exchanges with Elder Gentry! Hes super funny, and laughs at literally everything (and his laugh is contagious) so it's a blast hanging out with him because he enjoys life. We met a lady named Sarah and I gave away another Book of Mormon which I've had a bad habit of doing lately haha--our mission is out of them, so I'm having to cut into my secret stash. >:) We met up with the other Elders again at the end of the evening and had a great night at their place.

Tuesday we went to district council in Minden, and then went and ate at a unmarked blue building that some people claim is called simply "Minden Seafood." It was actually pretty good though, I got the popcorn shrimp with cocktail sauce and fries which is often my choice at a place where I'm unsure about the fish. It was pricey but pretty good! After lunch we drove up to Springhill, and went out with Sammy in the afternoon! At his house he has food storage from floor to ceiling filling every room with little walkways through it all haha--its kinda crazy. We went with him to visit Tawanna, who's a recent convert that recently moved into our branch! She's really nice, but is bed-ridden. Her Grandma who has dementia also stays with her and was very delusional. But we had a really good visit, and afterwards we went and taught a lady named Carolina. She didnt seem completely there haha--she talked most of the time. To give you an idea what her life is like, she has this racoon that she likes to feed hotdogs in her backyard. 

After going out with Sammy we drove back to Magnolia, and then talked to an inactive member about gaming! He showed us some of his games, and magic cards, and I knew a lot about it all so hopefully was able to help him see that we can enjoy life and have fun AND have the Gospel. We also found a lady named Doneshia who has one leg, her step-daughter who lives a few houses down but comes over so much that she basically has 2 homes, and this guy named David (called "The David" in our area book) who isn't all there but will randomly blurt out super intelligent things when you least expect them. It's quite a group! But they are really interested in the Book of Mormon, and we had a really good lesson with them. They want us to come back every day, so we are doing our best to at least come by every 2 days. 

Wednesday we did service at the Thrift store, and tested some old electronic typewriter thingies. In the evening we drove up to Waldo, and we taught Xavier about the Restoration! We called Brother Bahr in, and he was able to share his testimony and experience with receiving revelation, which set Xavier off on a vision he just saw the other day of his future wife (he hopes) haha

He also got out his pistol and showed it to us, not a very nice gun but at least he likes us and just wanted to show it to us! 

On Thursday we walked the dogs as usual, and did weekly planning as well! They came out with a new PMG which makes weekly planning so much better, and Area Book has a feature where you can do it all in there now! Also there are 4 lessons instead of 5 now. 

We biked in the evening and taught Becky, and read in 2 Nephi 31 with her. Every week she promises to come to church, and she never does tsk tsk. After Becky we taught The David, Doneshia, and Sharlene again, this time the Plan of Salvation! We had Sister Hunter join us virtually for the lesson which was really good. The David offered to say the closing prayer, and then came and put his hands on our backs and asked some questions throughout while he prayed haha

Friday we did service at the Thrift store and I took it upon me to start sorting their awful jumble of thousands and thousands of cords. I started making a bin for every kind of cord imaginable. I only got about a 10th of the way through in 2 hours, but I made good progress. I have never seen so many micro USB cords in my whole life. I probably processed more than most peoples families go through in 3 generations! It was fun though. 

In the afternoon we drove down to Springhill, and went out with Johnny in his brand new Dodge Charger, which he is very proud of and is really excited about it. I like how much he likes it, he genuinely thinks it's really cool, and likes to tell us about it, which I admire. Most people we visited did not answer, except for a pretty much deaf inactive member. We had a good visit with him that consisted of us saying things and him saying "huh?" Or "what was that?" We gave him a blessing though! For dinner Johnny took us to Sams Southern Eatery which is one of the best restaurants! I had it in Texarkana many moons ago and it was just as good as I remembered. The fries are some of the best ever made, and so is the burger! 

After dinner we drove back and on the way visited some people out in the middle of nowhere. One house we visited the first step up to the door snapped in half when we stepped on it haha--so many abandoned houses out here!

On Saturday we had a lesson with a guy from Africa who we could hardly understand, and then we went and talked with Ronny. Runny is not a member of the church, but he was married to one at one point. He goes to Temple Square every few weeks, and to Nauvoo every few months. He knows more about the church then some members. He loves the Tabernacle Choir, he loves the church in general. Sometimes people haven't been very nice to him at church in the past, and yet he seems to just laugh it off and still likes the church anyway. He met Spencer W. Kimball, and all of the apostles at that time, and then ate a private dinner with one of them after sitting with them at a meeting. He visits the gravesites for many of the apostles that really made an impact on him often. He has a Mormon Trail Cookbook that he just likes to read, and showed us all his pictures from Nauvoo of all of the Church sites he loves haha

But for some reason he isn't a member and doesnt seem to have a desire to be one. It'd pretty baffling and on our visit we couldn't really figure out why...

After Ronny, we walked some puppies for the shelter. They didn't really know how to walk much less with a collar on so most of the time they kinda just stumbled around haha--I spent the afternoon finalizing some stuff for Sunday and making some agendas for our meetings, and then we went and stopped by every person who said they could come to church that we could think of! We went up to Waldo and down to Emerson, and all over Magnolia as well. It used an astounding amount of miles, but due to us being too careful we have an excess of them! And it was lucky we drove too because it sooo hot. 

Sunday church was good! If I do say so myself since I gave the talk haha--it went well and we had Tyre, Sharlene, David, and Doneshia show up! After church I set apart Sister Hunter as the new RSP and I think she's going to do great! Nothing else too noteable to report on, but we biked around in the evening and talked to a lot of impaired people as usual.

-Abe